Cremated Ashes

After a cremation, the crematorium will prepare the cremated remains (often referred to as ashes) and return them to the funeral director or directly to the family, depending on the arrangements made. 

There is no right or wrong decision about what to do with the ashes. Some families know immediately, while others prefer to take time before deciding.

When Will the Ashes Be Ready?

Ashes are not usually available immediately after the funeral. Your funeral director or crematorium will let you know when they are ready for collection, which is often within a few days, although this can vary.

Who Can Collect the Ashes?

Your funeral director will explain the arrangements made during the funeral planning.

The ashes may:

• Be collected by the funeral director.
• Be collected by the person named on the cremation paperwork.
• Be retained temporarily by the crematorium if requested.

If someone different wishes to collect the ashes, please discuss this with your funeral director or the crematorium in advance.

What Can We Do with the Ashes?

Families have many options, including:

• Keeping the ashes at home.
• Burying the ashes in a cemetery or churchyard.
• Interring the ashes in a family grave.
• Scattering the ashes in a meaningful place (with the landowner's permission where required).
• Placing the ashes in a memorial garden.
• Keeping them in a memorial urn.
• Incorporating a small amount into memorial jewellery or glass.
• Dividing the ashes between family members, if appropriate.

There is no time limit on making your decision. Many families choose to wait until they feel ready.

Choosing an Urn

Ashes can be placed in a wide variety of urns, including:

• Traditional urns.
• Wooden urns.
• Ceramic urns.
• Metal urns.
• Biodegradable urns.
• Keepsake urns.
• Scattering tubes.

Your funeral director can explain the different options available.

Scattering Ashes

If you wish to scatter ashes, think carefully about the location.

Before scattering ashes:

• Make sure you have permission if the land is privately owned.
• Check any local regulations.
• Consider weather conditions, particularly windy days.
• Think about whether other family members would like to be present.

Some crematoria also have dedicated gardens where ashes may be scattered or buried.

Memorial Keepsakes

A small amount of ashes can be used to create lasting keepsakes, including:

• Memorial jewellery.
• Glass ornaments.
• Paperweights.
• Memorial hearts.
• Decorative artwork.

These can often be arranged weeks, months or even years after the funeral.

Please Remember

Not every decision has to be made immediately. If you're unsure what you would like to do with the ashes, speak to your funeral director. They can explain the available options and help you make a decision when the time feels right.

A Final Thought

There is no "right" way to remember a loved one. Whether you choose to keep the ashes, bury them, scatter them or create a memorial keepsake, the most important thing is choosing what brings comfort to you and your family.

Top Tip

Don't feel pressured to make a decision straight away. Many families keep their loved one's ashes for weeks, months or even years before deciding on a permanent resting place or memorial. Take the time you need.